We've all got something in our past that has re-shaped us in some way, some sort of memory that sticks out. But for some reason, on the X Factor, and in life in general, these things that we focus on are usually always negative. What I mean, is, can we use our past as an excuse for our present?
Why is it that the bad things that happen in life haunt us, make us irrationally wary, and can drag us down, but our achievements don't exactly speak to the same volume.
People on reality TV shows use these sorts of set backs to help them win the sympathy vote, which is stupid. However, is there any honesty there? Maybe these things really do weigh us down.
As we get older, and life's lessons take their toll, do challenges become harder? Is there only so much a person can take before we loose our optimism? I don't know if you've noticed, but sometimes, after people smile, they're smile slowly fades back to their normal expression. Well, as we age and become more exposed to undesirable events, do peoples' smiles fade quicker?
If I make the effort to look back at my life so far, it seems I can't win. The shit I've been through is a little blurry, I think I've chosen to forget that. And the good memories, well, they're even sadder. Because they're times that I can never re-capture. God, I'm a delight aren't I?
I've heard some people referring to their bad past, and they say that they're glad it's happened as it's contributed to the person they are now. Is this just a way of avoiding regret?
If I could erase all of the bad things that have happened in my life, I might be a bit different and less grateful of the peaceful side of life, but I'd also be a happier person.
All I know is that having a hard time in life doesn't really make you more deserving of being a winner of a talent contest - you could still be a bad person inside.
I think the way to win anything is to focus on the positive things that have contributed to one's personal development, alternatively, focusing on Simon Cowell's beautiful, dazzling smile won't hurt.
I think it's natural for people to want sympathy, which is why we tend to be more vocal about negative aspects of our past. I don't know about you, but I certainly have added a few details here and there about some things, even flat-out lied to get some sympathy - and it worked, too. I don't think it speaks volumes about who I am, because I think every does it. Everyone needs to here "there, there," every once in a while. People need to hear "there, there" more than they need to hear "I'm proud of you" so that's why I think people tend to have a more negative attitude to their past.
ReplyDeleteMy girlfriend asked me why I don't talk about my past to her, and I couldn't give her a proper answer. I'm not particularly ashamed of it, nor am I shy about talking about it, it's just not something I see as relevant to share with her - it's true that's caused some friction with us (she's very vocal about her past) but I think she understands.
I also think it depends on who is around when we're talking. The only situation I can think of where openly talking about your positive past, almost to the point of arrogance, would be in a job interview (and, granted, whilst flirting, depending on how much vodka was involved - although, again, I admit I used to try and use the sympathy tactic instead, needless to say it didn't work).
It's a lot easier to make someone give you sympathy (or at least pretend to), than it is to make them proud of you, and I think, as humans (however existential this may sound) the easy way out is the only way out.